Relationships

I’m grateful for friends who tell me I’m wrong.

When I think about my life and the people in it, I am reminded of the value of good and honest friendships. The people who are dearest to me all seem to have one thing in common—they call me out on my crap. Truth is a real thing. I try to talk to my 5-year-old about the difference between a fact and a belief. But teaching her about truth involves more than that—it’s also about being humble enough ...

Parents Are People Too

I turn 30 in 30 days. All the stigma surrounding a number seems to have skipped over me. I am excited for an excuse to get my friends together; these days with everyone having little babies or toddlers it’s quite the challenge. I would love to say it will be some epic bash, but I can already hear how the conversations will play out through the entirety of the evening. Kids, kids, kids. I stay home...

When Your Parenting is Put to the Test

In a few weeks, my son will be on his way to college. At such a time, lots of parents take stock (just google “tips for parents of college students” or look for online essays on the topic). I’m a bundle of nerves, sublimating my anxiety into buying sheet sets and collecting boxes for the car ride, one which will result in driving home without the boy who, now almost a man, was the second-grade “ne...

Kids are a gift.

A Google search for “quotes about children” yields countless insights from writers, leaders, and thinkers praising children as a gift. But when I did a similar search about marriage and kids, I found a growing body of research saying that couples without children are actually happier and more content. As I considered both searches, I realized that they are reflective of a tension in our culture ab...

Parenting

What is the Christian view of parenting? To be honest, there really isn’t one. Christians hold to a whole lot of different ideas, just as the rest of the world does. Some are strict, some more permissive. Some believe in attachment parenting, free-range parenting, or whatever the latest fad may be. Others rely on the advice and example of their own parents or of people they trust who are also rais...

The Funny Side of Divorce

Ok…who am I kidding? There’s absolutely nothing funny about divorce. It’s terrible. Hands down, it’s in the Top 5 Most Horrible Things I’ve Ever Experienced. If you’ve never been through it, take my word for it. It’s…Terrible. (With a capital T—that rhymes with P for ‘Please make it stop!’) That being said, I never thought I’d find myself in this position and there’s no way I was prepared fo...

The Very Public Nature of a Very Private Matter

Divorce sucks. No matter if it’s “amicable” or a battle royale, the process is grueling, emotionally taxing, and in the age of digital media—horribly public. If the legal documents, division of property, and emotions were not enough, today’s relational landscape includes navigating the ins-and-outs of social media as well! Today, more and more couples dissolving their marriages in their 30s and 40...

Divorce

Divorce is a painful subject. That’s why I think I’d better say where I’m coming from up front—my parents were divorced, and someone I love dearly is on the verge of divorce as I write. I’m married, but there were times when I feared we were going to wind up in the courts as well. So there’s that. What do Christians think about divorce? As you know, there’s a huge spectrum of views and practices, ...

The Vital, Overlooked Response to Tragedy

What can I do? The question chased me Monday morning. What can I do when I wake up to hear that over 50 lives were lost, over 500 people were injured, and Las Vegas is grieving. I am grieving, too. What can we do? What will we do? There are many practical things we can do to feel involved—give blood, attend a memorial, continue to gather supplies for those affected by the recent hurricanes. We can...

Family

Family. It’s in the news. It’s on your mind, most likely (how many people don’t have family problems?). What is this thing “family”? And what does Christianity have to say about it? Christians understand families as something God created—an institution among humans that has been around from the beginning. They are (generally speaking) something that human beings benefit from, just as we do from fo...

My husband has a mistress.

My husband has a mistress.  He is not alone in this—most of us do. That’s right, these days the cell phone is quickly becoming the harlot of the 21st century. It’s not breaking news that the cell phone is amazing, yet has some pretty obvious setbacks. For me, this has come at a cost to my relationship. I knew this issue wasn’t just a fleeting feeling when I started to feel jealousy toward my husba...

We want independent kids…right?

I drove down the country roads crisscrossing Indiana and Ohio, my friend looking on a map while we tried to figure out where we were in the middle of the Heartland. We were just two high school students nearing the end of our junior year, and we were hopelessly lost. No cell phones, no GPS, and just our adolescent map skills to get us to the youth retreat that we were headed to. We had promised ou...

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